Fictional Birds I Have Imagined Spotting from My Apartment Windows

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Airborne Finch: like any other bird, except only ever seen in flight.

Long-necked Curmudgeon: sharp beak, long neck, territorial. resentful of leaving chosen terrain. not to be confused with the Western Curmudgeonly Longneck, which is virtually identical, but has faint frown-like markings adorning the upper beak.

Washington Crested Senator: small, migratory, rarefied. regularly engages in what ornithologists colloquially refer to as “call time,” several hours of repetitive appeal.

The Rock Dove: hum your favorite guitar solos at this fine specimen, and it will faithfully reproduce up to sixteen bars with perfect recall.

Italian Hopper: contemporary mores prevent me from describing this further.

***CRIMSON SHRIEKER***: just a cardinal–but now it sounds a lot cooler, right?

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