1. You are a girl in a cabin, a window, a train, or at a specific street address.
2. Your connection to the Internet will be lost at some point. You will not regain it until the critical moment. There will also be a moment when you’re past the carnage and reading coverage of the previous week’s events from a position of safety.
3. The ex is not the one who was crazy.
4. You will smash crockery during a significant conversation, potentially alerting people to your presence, or you will hear crockery smashed while having a significant conversation, indicating the presence of a concealed eavesdropper.
5. You think you know how many siblings or members of your extended family you have? Ha. Think again.
6. You’re not like other girls—you’re deeply flawed and full of rich inner complexity. You wear clothes that don’t fit right and your bangs might be uneven, for example.
7. The author’s attempt to introduce a fair-play mystery while contriving to get rid of cellphones as a plot destroyer means you are in for some record-breaking weather.
8. The man with the cruel, sardonic twist to his mouth is never on your side.
9. Take heart: in your sleep, you will no longer be plagued by nonsensical dreams. Instead, every dream contains relevant insight, an epiphany about the central mystery, or is prophetic in nature.
10. The precocious teenager is a material witness at best.
11. You will escape, but you’ve either got a showy head wound or a nasty sprained ankle to show for your trials.
12. You should have left when the Internet connection was lost.